Photo by: I’m Fantastic

Life in this century is amazingly fast. With new technological innovations everyday, we have everything we need right at our fingertips. As a Deaf person, I live by my computer and pager daily. They are my lifeline to the world and keep me connected. But, they also suck out my soul and keep me tethered to my seat.

There are times when I feel the computer cords snaking around my ankles and wrists, the glow of the screen stealing the color from my blue-gray eyes. Other times, I sense the invisible radio waves humming ethereally overhead, buzzing down onto my hip and into my bones from my pager as it shakes my carcass throughout the day. At times like this, I know I need to unplug, detach, get away and breathe!

In this day and age, even those people who are not tech savvy or bound to their monitors and pagers like us deaf folks, need to take stock. We are nation whose lifestyles are ultra-busy with work deadlines, fundraisers, our children’s events or extra-curricular activities, and more. In reality, with so much to do and so many places to be, it isn’t easy to slow down. We are a nation in serious need of a vacation!

Photo by: Eddi 07

Today, I remembered the advice of my Kindergarten teacher when she said, “Always remember to stop, look and listen.” And I followed. I took the day off to recharge, rejuvenate and renew.

I rose a bit early so I could prepare my son his favorite breakfast. He looked me in the eye and smiled real big and said, “Mmmmm. Thanks Mom!” I sat with him a moment and watched him devour it heartily. Just sitting still and watching my 12 year old son eat was a gift. I haven’t stopped to really look at how he chews with his braces, or how he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. I’ve missed him. I packed his lunch and handed him his freshly washed hoodie. It smelled of Bounce and teenage boy’s cologne. I helped him get his zipper unstuck, hugged him warmly and smelled his clean hair. He comes just under my nose now.

(…When did he grow so tall?)

I looked him straight in the eye and told him he smelled real good. He smiled as I held his face in my hands and planted a kiss on his smooth forehead, feeling his spiky bangs tickle my nose. He looked at me so I could read his lips and articulately and slowly mouthed, (as CODA’s do), “I-love-you-Mama.”

(Sigh…. Where have I been…)

My husband, who usually drives my son and his friend to school, was still sleeping. Rather than wake him to drive the kids, I kept the room dark, touched his ankles lightly and whispered, “Don’t get up. I’ll take the kids.” I let my husband rebel at the daylight savings time like many others would be doing that day. He signed, “Thank you” as he rolled over and went back to sleep. When I got back home, I pulled back the covers, and joined him. As I lay there watching my husband’s chest rise and fall, I decided I was going to stay home for the day.

As a Manager, you work until the job is done. But in reality, the job is never done. It multiplies daily. Don’t get me wrong. I like my job, and I do it well, but I work all the time. It’s just the nature of work in management. I had brought home a project on Friday that needed to be done last week, but got triaged. It had to be in by Monday. It was an intense task and I worked all weekend. It was clear this morning that I was in sore need of some flex time. I checked my appointment book as I do each morning and realized I had an uncharacteristic unscheduled day. Certainly if I went into the office, my schedule would fill up quickly. But I decided to use the day to seek balance and rejuvenation. Fortunately, the boss agreed and approved. I guess I had some angels in my corner.

(…Thank you…)

Photo by: LFL16

After we each woke and showered, my husband and I decided to go to brunch. We took a lovely drive up the Sunol grade on 680, through bright-green rolling hills that seemed greener and more lush than Co. Kerry, Ireland. I love this time of year where I live. The rain and the spring sunshine have made everything grow verdant. I noticed how clear and blue the sky was on the way. The world seemed suddenly full of color! Have I been living in a closet? I cracked the window down a bit and breathed in the fresh air. I watched the strands of my long, blonde hair fly in the wind through the crack of the glass.

At brunch, I savored the marmalade, honey and earthy bran tastes we had with our meal. I paid attention to the way my husband sat sideways with his knee bent up on the seat and his arm hanging over the back of the booth as he listened to my mindless Blarney jabber. When we were done, we spent some time wandering in a bookstore, one of our favorite past times, and as usual, we bought a few books. Before we left, I bought myself a cold iced Chai tea, my all-time favorite drink. I love how the spices and flavors just hang on my cheeks for minutes after each swallow. My senses had come alive!

We chose to take the scenic route home through Niles Canyon, and I’m glad we did. Having slowed down long enough to pay attention to the landscape and surroundings, I came up with a really incredible vision. I had a vision of a tree full of colored ribbons; Ribbons holding wishes, promises, or prayers. When our son came home from school, the three of us headed back out to the craft store to buy some supplies. When I told my son of my vision, he looked at me with eyes of wonder and said with that over-enunciated mouthing that hearing children of Deaf parents often use, “Mama,-you’re-so-spi-ri-tual.” I melted.

Now that he shared this vision, my son found the most beautiful branch for us to use as our Wishing Tree. I picked out some colorful ribbons and my husband helped me find just the right pot to use as a base. With some lucky four-leafed clovers and some pretty green stones, we left the store with excitement. Guided by this wonderful vision and a sense of renewal, I crafted out this Wishing Tree to celebrate a bit of our Irish background, St. Patrick’s Day, and the Vernal Spring Equinox coming ahead.

The Wishing Tree is complete with a little porcelain faerie and a dragonfly, which I believe to be my son’s spirit animal, as they are always around him no matter where he goes. My son and husband played along as we each chose a ribbon, held it in our hands, closed our eyes and made a wish or prayer. Then we tied it somewhere onto the tree. If the wish or prayer comes true, we will tie on another ribbon to celebrate. Even if it does not come to be, we can tie on a wishing ribbon at any time. There is no limit. Just good thoughts all around, anytime, for anyone.

So here is what I learned from this day: When we slow down, pay attention, and make the effort to be fully present in every situation, really clear visions come into focus. Having an incredible vision, whether it be at home or at work, does very little for us if we do not have the energy to achieve it. Slowing down, seeking balance and rejuvenation in our lives is important if we want to move ahead.

Posted by LaRonda on Monday, March 9th, 2009 at 10:19 pm.