(Ch. 58 of my storyblog of my journey into Deafhood…)

After returning from Gallaudet, with the financial help of my Vocational Rehabilitation (VR) Counselor, I continued my education as a full-time student at California State University, Northridge (CSUN). I had learned of CSUN from some classmates at Gallaudet. CSUN was a college with a large deaf population mainstreamed among the larger hearing student body. Even though I enjoyed my experience at Gallaudet immensely, I missed the sun, my family and my love, Brent. I was ready to move back to the West Coast. I learned that CSUN had a Deaf Studies program so I decided I would give it a try…

Even though I had been away from my family for 5 months while at Gallaudet, I still felt dependent on my them the whole time. I had no job and no money of my own. Mama, bless her heart, was working another job just so she could send me small checks now and then to give me some pocket change. My room and board were covered in my tuition and fees at Gallaudet.

Now, back on the West Coast, I applied for Social Security disability benefits (SSI), purchased a car, and headed toward sunny, Southern California. Because my previous grades were good and I was a serious student, my Vocational Rehabilitation (VR) Counselor helped secure the funds to pay for all my books and tuition at CSUN. My SSI money was just enough to pay for my monthly car payment, auto insurance, gas to keep my car running, and my room and board. My disability benefits also provided me with health insurance coverage. I was pretty much set. It wasn’t until I left for Northridge at the age of 21, that I felt like I was truly on my own.

My grades remained good while at CSUN, but my social life, compared to Gallaudet, was practically non-existent. I no longer lived in dorms where most of the other Deaf CSUNians lived, nor was I a member of any Deaf sorority. I was just a boarder at a house with a nice hearing family, and lived far enough from campus that I had to drive to get there. While I shared some classes with other Deaf students, and shared a meal or two, I just didn’t have the same kind of social life I had so much enjoyed at Gallaudet. I believe this was in part, due to the fact that I became more serious about my studies by then. I was committed to my long distance relationship with Brent, so I did not date. Basically, I buckled down and put my social life on the back burner.

The few close relationships I did form while at CSUN were with my hearing house mate who knew some signs, and with the sign language interpreters who interpreted my classes. At times while at CSUN, I had felt that I was not Deaf enough to fit in with Deaf crowds, and not able to lip-read or follow enough to hang with hearing people who didn’t sign. I was neither here nor there, perpetually stuck in between. So signing interpreters became the most comfortable group of people for me to hang out with. It was such a contrast after feeling so included at Gallaudet!

During my 3-year stay at CSUN, I considered Liberal Studies, Religious Studies and Teaching as possible majors before I finally decided on Deaf Studies. In 1986, I graduated with a Bachelors degree in Deaf Studies with a Human Services option from CSUN. My boyfriend, Brent, had also graduated from college by then and the two of us began to plot out our future so we could finally be geographically in the same place.

We both decided to relocate up to the beautiful Pacific Northwest. Within months, I landed a part-time job as a Houseparent (now called Student Life Counselor) in the dorms at the Washington School for the Deaf (WSD). There, I worked part-time with young elementary-age Deaf girls, getting them up each morning and ready for school. The job was easy, but not enough to pay my bills, so I took on a second part-time job working with hearing Kindergarteners in an After School Program for a YMCA.

I had noticed that when I worked with the hearings kids, I wore my hearing aids and felt tense. Yet, when I worked with the Deaf kids at the Deaf school, I took my hearing aids out, and felt more at ease using sign language. I did both jobs well, but eventually, I began to realize I felt more comfortable with the Deaf signing children than with the hearing children I struggled to lip-read.

Unfortunately, there were no full-time positions available at the Deaf school then. While I enjoyed my part-time jobs, in truth, neither was what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. I wanted something more challenging and gainful, so I decided to return to college and pursue a Master’s degree.

In 1989, Brent and I finally married and moved to Corvallis, Oregon where we both pursued Master’s degrees. I attended Western Oregon State College (now called Western Oregon University) a half an hour away in Monmouth, Oregon. With the help of my Vocational Rehabilitation (VR) Counselor, I was admitted to the Rehabilitation Counseling, Deafness (RCD) program. Once again my books were paid for. I also qualified for a small scholarship and a large stipend, which helped pay for my tuition.

Being deaf had now become a boon in that it allowed me to take full advantage of the support systems available for disabled students. I am grateful that I never had to work while going to school. This allowed me to focus fully on my studies. As a result, in 1990, I graduated from the RCD (Counseling) program with all A’s and only one B throughout my entire 2 years of post-graduate education.

Though I was learning about the field of Vocational Rehabilitation for Deaf people, my practicums and internships were all mostly done in Deaf residential schools or colleges rather than in VR settings. I had discovered my interests in counseling were more aligned with Personal Growth Counseling, School Counseling and Prevention Education rather than helping Deaf people find employment, so this is where I chose my academic and internship emphasis.

After I graduated with my MS in Counseling, I fell across an opportunity to temporarily replace the School Counselor on maternity leave at the Oregon School for the Deaf (OSD) where I had been doing my internship. Just before her return that Fall, the heavens opened again, and I was offered a full-time permanent position as a School Counselor back up at the Washington School for the Deaf in Vancouver. There, I remained employed for nearly 10 years.

In 1996, I became a mom. It was soon clear that working full-time was not something I wanted to do as a new parent. My husband and I both knew it was time for us to shift focus. By 1999, my small family relocated to the San Francisco Bay Area, and in 2000, when my son started pre-school, I was offered a part-time job at St. Joseph’s Center for the Deaf in Hayward, where I have been happily employed for the last 7 + years as a Family Life Coordinator/Certified Parent Educator for the Deaf community.

(Footnote: You have been reading the final chapters in my summer storyblog entitled: My Journey Into Deafhood, which tells of the first recognition of my deafness and waking up to a world of silence, 26 years ago. It also tells of how I grieved, coped, adapted and then thrived as I learned to embrace my Deaf self. Thank you for reading! The final installment will show on August 8th, 2007. More coming soon…)

6 Responses to “My Journey Into Deafhood: My Compass and Life Map ~”

    Ahh .. you left Gallaudet after a short stay. Now I got it. Smile ..

    I have been following your inspiring stories. I realize that the remaining stories have not been posted yet but I have not noticed any mention of getting a cochlear implant. I’d assume that it would have been one of the first things recommended by one of your physicians. It is becoming a growing trend among many deaf adults to get a CI. If you didn’t like it, you can always quit wearing the device. Just wondering ….
    Keep up the good work!

    PS. you do not have to post this on your website but I’d love to establish a correspondence via email or possibly vp. Many thanks!
    your cyberspace friend,
    jane

    Oh no wonder you left Gallaudet! Very interesting on your way to get MS counseling degree! Dang, I don’t know if I could go back college to get degree myself. I am still taking my own time to think about it…

    Have you ever thought about publishing your journey? :)

    CSUN is blowing/ blew a lot of opportunities to discover ways to get students together through paraprofessional and other student life opportunities. I graduated from Gally and moved back to LA. Returning to CSUN doesn’t seem like much of an opportunity to socialize and I’m a graduate student for 2 years now. I seem to have more friends who are learning to sign to hang out with. A recent deaf event I went to - CSUN Spring Banquet was mostly entertained by staff and I was bored there. I couldn’t wait to get out of there. I believe that with the right tools and training, CSUN (via NCOD and Deaf Studies and DHH Credential program) could allow students to lead with plenty of leadership and social events. LA has a large deaf community and its too bad that they don’t weave the two bodies to show role models to the undergraduate students here that need it most. Gallaudet had done well for me to fulfill my needs.

    LaRonda,

    How could you feel that you were “not Deaf enough” at CSUN AFTER you came from Gally?? Somehow this does not compute…if any indication for me, I’d think that Gally would be the ultimate place to learn how to become yourself as a Deaf identity. MInd explaining or giving more into that insight?

Something to say?


Copyright 2006-2008 by LaRonda Zupp