(Ch. 29 of my story of my journey into Deafhood…)
I remember my Grandpa Ransom coming to see me in my recovery room. He asked me if there was anything he could do for me. I was starving for a donut (Geez!), having watched too many Winchell’s commercials from the silent TV in my hospital room, and I practically begged him to smuggle me in one. Grandpa laughed, waved his hand in the air and said, “Sheesh!” He told me he would bring me in something better, which got me all excited. Later, he brought me in a big basket of fruit, which wasn’t what I expected, but was good none-the-less, and I shared it with everyone. He knew what was good for me and I loved him for it.
Then he granted me one more wish. I told him I wanted my hair washed. So many people were coming to see me in the hospital and my hair hadn’t been washed in 2 weeks! So Grandpa rounded up some nurses to do the job. They came in, broke down the top of my bed, wheeled in a portable sink and washed my hair. It was pure heaven! When the washing was complete, Grandpa popped his head in my room and gave me a wink and a “thumbs-up.” I blew him a kiss as they wrapped the towel around my head to dry. This small gift from my grandfather meant the world to me.
Mama dug through her purse and pulled out a comb and a small hand mirror that she put just out of my reach. Then she left to get some rubber bands from the nurse’s station so she could pull my hair back into a ponytail since I didn’t have my blow dryer or curling iron there.
Mama returned and began gently lifting and brushing my hair with her fingers to help it dry. I have always loved when she stroked my hair or massaged my scalp. My mother has the hands of an angel. Most nurses do. But when your mother is a nurse, and your mom, her touch is golden.
After my hair dried, Mama secured it back into two long braided pigtails and told me I looked lovely. I asked her for the mirror so that I could see for myself. Mama hesitated for a moment and then gently placed the mirror in my hand, stopping me from raising it just yet.
Tenderly, she said, “Honey, before you look in the mirror, let me explain that your body went through a lot of trauma over the last week. I don’t want you to be scared when you see yourself. You actually look a lot better than you did.” Then she let go of my hand as I winced. Nervously, I brought the mirror up to my face and let out a gasp in disbelief.
“Mama!” I stressed. “Look at my eyes!” They were bloody inside, and I looked like I’d been in a car collision. Then I ran my fingers across the thick, dark scabs on my eyelids, which made me look like I was wearing theatrical make-up. Mama reminded me that my body had filled up with 30 extra pounds of fluid, which made the membranes and blood vessels inside my eyes break open, and the thin skin on my eyelids rupture. The long scabs had grown over the cracks. “I look like Cleopatra!” I stammered, and we both let out a little laugh.
“Actually,” my stepfather, Roger, announced as he entered the room, “you look more like a Swiss Miss ready to do a Hot Cocoa commercial.” Roger had come in to my room just then, and kissed me on the forehead. I was glad to see him. Roger’s humor was welcome that day. Mama told me I looked adorable.
“Why is my face is so big?” I pouted. Mama explained it was from the Prednisone and Cortisone medications they were giving me. She reassured me that my face puffiness would reduce once I was off those meds. Mama then took the mirror from my hand and put it away. She asked me if I was ready to greet my visitors. I nodded, ‘yes’, with a heavy sigh.
(Footnote: You are now reading the chapters entitled: My Journey Into Deafhood, which tells of the first recognition of my deafness and waking up to a world of silence. It also tells of how I grieved, coped, adapted and then thrived as I learned to embrace my Deaf self. Thank you for reading! More coming soon…)
LaRonda,
Out of my curiosity, do you still have your voice or not?
Thanks for your continuance of the story.
Left by michele on July 27th, 2007
Curious how did you get those fanastic photos?? I would love to surf and collect some for my blog. Smile
Left by Kim on July 27th, 2007
I know how you feel about feeling SO clean at the head! I too hadn’t anyone washing my hair at all for two weeks while I was in GWU hospital (after hit&run.) A friend in California (bless her heart!) asked another friend to come in and wash my hair. I had tears in my eyes as he washed my hair. I was in BLISS for having my hair washed and combed!!!! So, I exactly know how you feel…!
Wolfers
Left by Wolfers on July 27th, 2007
Michele,
My voice is the same as it was when I was hearing. the only thing different know is that my throat is a little more groggy. I cannot hear myself when I sing though, and I am never sure I am on pitch when I do sing. I only sing to myself, not in public like I used to. I sang to my son as a baby and he seemed to enjoy it then, but as he has grown, he prefers the CD player to Mama’s voice! Ha! Understandable. But my speech has not changed. I talk like a hearing person. However, I cannot control the volume of my voice and often hearing people tell me I speak too softly or too loud. Sometimes, to avoid embarrassment, like when ordering a pizza in a loud restaurant, I will write my order down to avoid being too loud or too soft. The clerks often have trouble hearing me, or people look at me weird if I’m too loud. Ugh! So writing is easier, unless they sign. Then I’m in heaven!! EASY!!
Kim,
the photos I use on my blog are my trademark and they make my blog really “work!” It’s no secret. Anyone can find them. I use the free photos under the Creative Commons License at Flickr.com. These are photos that are allowed to be used as long as their photographer is identified and they are not used for sales. I search long and hard to find the right photos i want to bring out the mood. Thanks for noticing!
Wolfers,
You had that experience too?! Yeah! washing my hair after 2 weeks was BLISS like you said! (I love washing my hair in a cool, mountain creek, too, by the way! Nothing better!)
Thanks for your comments everyone!
~ LaRonda
Left by LaRonda on July 27th, 2007
Don’t you wear hearing aids? I would think for someone who had hearing for a long time, they would be of great aid? I would have thought they would help you determine just how loud your voice needs to be?
Color me clueless on hearing aids - stopped wearing them when I was 11, useless noisy things that they were (for me)!
Left by Belle on July 28th, 2007
Oh, I just now read your last chapter (32 or 33?) for Saturday. I think I can see where it is going - like me the sounds come in distorted. Right? I will wait patiently for the answers in the next chapters.
Left by Belle on July 28th, 2007
Wow, such a traumatic experience for a teenager. Looking at yourself and finding someone else must have been very hard. You must have been really brave or really loved to have been able to cope with it so well. (Probably both!)
Left by Carolyn on July 30th, 2007